As a parent, you need a little bit of white lies on your side. These can be used for a little extra sleep or a scare tactic to get them on their best behavior. Use them before they wise up.
1. “I will turn this car around!”
Everyone knows I will NOT turn this car around. I secretly hope you don’t yell at me one day to ‘DO IT!’
2. “Disneyland is closed since all the kids have to go to school.”
Yes, the Happiest Place on Earth closes every once in a while.
3. “If you don’t listen, no dinner, no dessert.”
You can’t stop someone from their basic human right. Please just listen.
4. “Daddy really wanted to play with you first! Wake him up and see.”
…Because mom can’t be bothered.
5. “The IPAD froze; we can’t buy any new games.”
I proceed to hide it after that. A new game is requested every 2.5 seconds.
6. “It’s time for bed.”
This is probably more of a lie to myself.
7. “I LOVE your art work.”
I do cherish every single one… but this is the 100th paper with a yellow crayon mark on it. Still love you though!
8. “If you scream again, Santa won’t bring you presents.”
Scare tactics all year around.
9. “The baby got in mommies belly because I ate him.”
I proceed to threaten him if he doesn’t listen. This sounds meaner than it really is. HAHA
10. “I don’t have any games on my phone.”
…Because I need to preserve my battery life for countless photos of you and Facebook scrolling.
Share your favorite white lies in the comments!